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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Personal Peace (06/01/06)

TITLE: Deliver Him from Evil
By Shari Armstrong
06/01/06


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“There’s nothing on TV.” I popped a movie in and stretched out on the couch, rubbing my ever-growing belly. “Daddy should be home soon.”

The phone interrupted my dozing. I yawned, “Hello?”

”Hi, Hon,” my husband’s voice greeted me.

”Hi. What’s up?” I glanced at my watch and realized he was really late.

“Well, first I’m ok and so is the car.”

I sat up, wide awake and heart pounding. “What happened?”

“Well, I got jumped. Bill and Linda are taking me to the ER to get checked. They’re going to follow me home, so I can drop off the car first and then file the police report.”

“Alright…I love you.” I was too shaken to move.

”I love you, too.”

“Lord, just bring him home safely.” Even though the worst was over before I even knew what had happened, I was in too much shock to cry. I knew there was no way I’d be able to go back to sleep until he was home and safe. I watched another movie in an attempt to keep my mind of things, without much success.

After a couple hours crawled by, I saw familiar headlights pull into the driveway. I met him outside, kissed him and just clung to him, finally letting the tears fall. “I could have lost you!”

“You didn’t.”

I looked up and saw the black eye, swollen shut. “What happened?”

“Some kids called in a fake order and jumped me. I’ll tell you the rest later, I need to go.”

I didn’t want to let go. “Ok.” We kissed again. “I love you.”

“I love you.” He got into his manager’s car and left for the police station.

* * *


He finally arrived home about the same time the sun started to peak up over the horizon. We sat on the couch and I looked at his injuries, which appeared worse than they had earlier. “So how did it happen?”

“We got a late order, and it was going to be the last run of the night. It seemed odd, so we even called to confirm the order. Bill decided it was ok to go ahead and go, but I left my wallet and tips for the night at the store. I took just enough change for what they ordered if they had forty bucks. I got there and the house was dark, so I should have just left, but I didn’t. I got out, looked around, but stayed near the car, leaving it running and had Bill on the phone.

A kid came up to me, and started digging in his pocket for the money. While I was waiting, another guy came around the car on my blind side and punched me. I dropped and just started yelling that I had wife and a daughter.”

How we were going to explain it to our daughter what happened when she woke up? I tried to keep from shaking as I listened and rubbed my belly, trying to relax so the contractions wouldn’t get stronger.

“After I dropped, they grabbed my phone, the cash and the pizzas, jumped in the car that was waiting for them and took off. I got up, and noticed the lights were now on at the house. They heard me yelling and came out to check. They let me use their phone to call the store.”

* * *


“I told them I’d finish out next week, but I wanted Friday and Saturday off, so we can go camping. I need to get away from here. Then I’ll look for something else when we get back. You don’t need to worry about me every night.”

”Ok, but we just won’t tell my doctor that we’re going.” I smiled, “I can sit in a chair there as easily as here.”

* * *


After he unpacked the car, he told me, “I’m not going to quit.’

”Really?”

”Yeah, I decided I can’t let those punks make the decision for me. I’m not going to let them control my life. But, I want you to call around and find a karate school for me once I’ve finished healing. I’m not going to let it happen again.”

* * *


I leaned back in bed, with our newborn son in my arms and listened to our daughter say her prayers.

“…and keep Daddy and all the other drivers out there safe.”


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This article has been read 1079 times
Member Comments
Member Date
George Parler 06/09/06
Very captivating story. I could see the black eye. Good job.
Amy Michelle Wiley 06/09/06
So glad it had a peaceful ending. Good story!
Brenda Craig06/09/06
Loved the flow,reminds me of Psalm 91, Well written, conveying a sense of peace and calm in a the midst of a desperate situation. Great, no exellent dialog. I only hope I could exhibit that much peace. He truly is a shield about us.
Jan Ackerson 06/12/06
Oh, how terrifying! I really like the character of the husband--fully developed in so few words, good job!
Shari Armstrong 06/12/06
Author's note: (now that hinting has started). This is a true story that happened Sept. '04, and it was my husband's third night on the job. It took awhile for life to get "back to normal", we were on edge for quite awhile, watching out the windows, etc. My husband even saw one of the kids in a store not long after it happened, but they didn't see him.

It's been a long process, but going camping that weekend and starting karate -and prayer of course -made a world of difference in my husband's peace of mind.

As I stated in my hint, thanks to their bragging in school, a girl who worked with my husband heard about it and was able to help identify them and they were arrested, tried and took a plea bargin. This was good, as it meant my husband didn't have to appear in court and have our name in public record. We don't know what they were sentenced, and really didn't care - it was over.
Pat Guy 06/12/06
Great job Shari of 'showing' us this terrible experience! Our town had a murder staged this very same way.

We could feel all the emotions through your writing - and that's a good thing! :)

Rita Garcia06/12/06
Well written! I love the ending with your daughter's prayer.
Jessica Schmit06/12/06
Hi Shari!

Wow, I love reading true stories. They pack a punch that is absent with fiction. This is a perfect story to fit in with the topic. I did find a few mistakes. I found the switching of the POV to be a little distracting and I don't think you needed the centered ***** after the husband was relating the story to his wife. But besides that, I thought the story was perfect. You covered all the points and wrote the story very well. great job!

Love,
Jess
Dr. Sharon Schuetz06/12/06
Good job, Shari. I liked it and admired your stamina and restraint.
Tesiri Moweta06/12/06
God has truly delivered us from all evil and given us His peace that surpasses human understanding. That's why we can remain strong in the midst of a storm.Thanks for sharing.
Rachel Rudd06/12/06
Thanks for sharing this, Shari. I can see that you could have put in so much more if not for the word count. It was well-written, especially the dialogue. I hope God continues to keep both of you safe!
T. F. Chezum06/12/06
Very well written and captivating story. Knowing that it is true makes it even more engaging. Good job Shari.
Sue Dent06/12/06
Well, Shari, I guess we're the pizza queens this week! Deliver it or go to the pizza hut and pick it up! I'm so glad everything workked out for ya'll! Excellent job of "showing" what happened!
Lynda Lee Schab 06/13/06
Nicely written, Shari. Even better now that I know it's true! I'm sorry for what your husband went through. I, for one, am glad to hear that they were caught. I hope their sentence was enough for them to learn their lesson! And thankfully, your husband was okay. Could have been much worse. Shudder. Thanks for sharing the experience with us. Blessings, Lynda
Virginia Gorg06/13/06
Children so often get it before we do "and keep Daddy...safe" Nicely done, good story.