The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 854 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
This was a nice story and I enjoyed it. There was a lot of narration though, like you were telling the story instead of letting me experience it on my own. Maybe more dialog could have broken up the information in the narration. I loved the line,
"Hope is the eyes of faith" I've never thought of it that way before. :)
05/12/06
There's a really powerful storyline in there. Excellent word choices mixed in. But ti felt like it was told and not shown ... just a bit too much telling. Not bad, I just don't think I experienced it as fully as I really wanted to. Excellent points, top of the line message, strong emotion. Over all good!
very very strong. Interesting approach. Great job.
I so enjoyed this story. I have never had to endure my husband being gone for more than a week - and at such an important and emotional time as when a couple is expecting a child, what comfort there would be in a project such as the quilt. There is a wonderful lesson of love here that is always welcome and needed. Thanks for sharing.
05/16/06
I like the story line that you have developed her. It would help to get a better glimpse into her heart by hearing her talk more. Anyway, thanks for sharing!