The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
04/26/12
Wow ... this was so clever! I really liked the perspective of Adam and Eve seeing some of the changes in the world and how they interpret them ... especially for the first time. I actually could see this story as a book, showing all the various "1st time" changes they see and how they learn and experience them. Very well done!
This was so completely enjoyable. Just seeing their fear take hold was amazing, the descriptions you used.
They totally misread the signs. But that's what fear does, makes us think the worst.
Really good work here. Thank you.
04/27/12
Interesting and thought provoking. Good writing!
04/27/12
A very unique approach for the subject at hand. A well written account of "what may have been going on" within their(Adam & Eve) minds after their "sin."

Nicely done. God Bless~
04/28/12
To me this was a very unique way of looking at how Adam and Eve may have looked back at what they had done in the Garden of Eden. Very nice approach on this subject and very good writing!
This is very clever.

You could use this article in a small group or as part of a sermon illustration.

I like the way you think outside the box. Keep writing!
05/01/12
Unique! I've never actually thought about what must've been going through the first humans' minds when faced with death. Clever and enjoyable. God bless.
This is such a clever piece. The title drew me in because I have suffered from deathly phobias for as long as I can remember.

The only part I stumbled over were the short spots in between dialog that weren't complete sentences like forcing a smile or voice cracking. If you had just added a pronoun or name He forced a smile it would be easier to picture who was speaking.

I think this POV from Adam and Eve was super clever. I never really thought of it like that before. It's interesting to read other's take on life. It also forces the reader to think which is always a good thing.
05/02/12
Awesome job. Way to be creative and really come at this topic from a different angle. I could kick myself for not thinking of this myself.

It seems to me you've written this as a script. I think it would be a great skit or even a one act production. Thanks for sharing!