Before God took control over my life, I was self-destructing and taking my loved ones along for the ride.
I used drinking as an escape from my failures as a husband, father and responsible man in general. I
sought out the deepest desires of the flesh under the illusion of only living once; go hard or die bored. In
retrospect, my life resembled a runaway train bound to wreck. You know the trainís going to derail at
some point. Youíre simply sticking around to see it happen. At the lowest point of my selfish descent, I
allowed Satan to use the death of my mother as an excuse to place my lustful desires ahead of my
familyís needs. I bought a motorcycle. Boy, did I regularly break a few laws while straddling that thing.
115 miles an hour seemed like a slow-motion blur while bobbing and weaving through highway traffic.
God got involved shortly afterwards. I guess heíd seen enough to know where I was headed and decided
to rescue me from my own stupidity. The Lord began the process of cleaning house in my life. The Bible
was introduced into my reluctant routine. I say reluctant, because I didnít want to read it. I fought the
idea of delving into the pages of scripture from the beginning, but the Lord put that book in plain view
everywhere I turned. I couldnít escape it. As I began to read, he slowly removed the physical distractions
Iíd grown accustomed to using. My cell phone disappeared; no more inappropriate texts and calls. My
video gaming was stripped away; no more hiding from my responsibilities. My motorcycle was sold; no
more reckless speeding. My drinking habits were rebuked, breaking the cycle of alcoholism in my
family. I fought every single change. Each time something was removed, I cried out in pain, or threw a
temper tantrum. But my Heavenly Father never relented.
Time and patience won me over. Godís removal of superficial things in my life left me with nothing else
to focus on except him. As I slowly began to pay attention to his subtle teachings, he reformed my
attitudes and decisions. I found myself wanting to be corrected; I had a need for transformation. God
made it possible to see Satanís work throughout my wretched lifestyle, and I hated who Iíd become. I
hated what I represented as a man, to my wife and children. I began asking God to make changes in my
Through the Lord, I became a brand new man. Destructive friendships were severed and my place of
employment was changed. I had to admit, remaining in the same place for 16 years had played a huge
part in my destructive behavior. God saw fit to move me. He broke down my false perceptions of
control, allowing me to recognize my need for his guidance, in my life. Where parties and clubs had once
captivated my attention, church became my choice for socializing. Where pornographic movies and
media once fueled my lustful desires, now televised sermons, Christian movies and media feed my soul.
Worldly conversations of the latest trends, fashions and attitudes once dominated the conversational
circles within my household, when I made time to participate with my family. Now, we regularly engage
in discussions on the Lord, heaven and his grace.
I am a work in progress. I still struggle with the temptations and trappings of the world, but today Iíve
got the Lordís guidance. Each new day brings about a new change in me. What I saw yesterday, may
have been unseen a week ago. What I learn today may be different from yesterday. Only God knows
what I may grasp tomorrow. Satanís tactics switch up, to accommodate Godís grace in my life, but he
has to know heís fighting a losing battle. I will never give myself over to him, ever again. And if God is
willing, I will continue striving to be his humble servant, for the rest of my days, in the name of Jesus.
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