The Official Writing Challenge
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I like the brevity of the depth in your dialogue - at human and divine levels.
I also enjoyed the touch of humour within the critical nature of your close. Well done.
This is a nice story. It has a wonderful message and is sprinkled with just the right amount of suspense.
This was powerful. I especially like the last line.
Good picture of the change that can take place in the deepest part of any who will receive Him. Takes some longer than others.
If only all the skeptics had a chance like you MC to realize that there is more to life than what we have here on earth.
To answer your questions... I don't think it ends abruptly at all, but then I know about how I have a hard time keeping it under 750 and understand having to end it before I think it's finished,

As for the He, I will admit that confused me at first. I had to reread it. I think it should be lowercase because the sentence hasn't ended yet. But I could be wrong.

Again I think you did a great job on this piece and I could really feel your passion in spreading the news about Jesus and heaven.
Good story! I don't think it ended too ubruptly.

"He" would be lowercase. A tad of red ink: the voices in this didn't sound "masculine" enough to be an authentic exchange between guys.

Good angle for the topic :-)
Great story. I like the twist ending. Your red ink has been applied in another post, so I won't echo the corrections. You have captured the skeptic quite well.
Hey there! :) I enjoyed reading your story. It reminded me of how Jesus met Saul on the road to Damascus. He was probably something of a skeptic, too. I like how you fitted the inner person and the message of salvation into your article. Great job with a tricky topic!