The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
You have a lot of lovely imagery here.
08/26/10
Well written, a joy to read, and I LOVE your opening line.

Loved it! :)
Sin and fear can definitely suffocate us. You did an excellent job in showing just that.
I had left my first love, and all that was left was a prison that continued to shrink around me.

Profound. Thanks.
I loved the word pictures you painted. Very well done-terrific.
08/30/10
You certainly caught my attention with your excellent and vivid opening paragraph. If I may say so, I felt you had a few too many metaphors in the air at the same time, moving briskly from sludge to cocoons to spider webs. But the sense of freedom at the end came across loud and clear.
09/01/10
Your personal testimony or one you have created, good.
Here's what I suggest. Tell the story, don't talk about the story. A little action will show the conflict.
I personally like descriptive writing and would like to do it better, but there may be a little too much here.
Envision yourself a storyteller surrounded by listeners and 'tell the story'. I look forward to more.

mona
09/01/10
I love the message here, especially the part about maintaining head-knowledge about Christ, but having lost "heart knowledge." The fear of that happening in my own life keeps me ever praying that the Lord will draw me always closer to Himself.

I know how it feels to experience that wonderful freedom from entangling sins and I was there breathing it in with you at the lovely ending.
Congratulations for placing in the top 15 of your level and in the top 40 overall.
07/03/11
Hanne, I'm going to feature this worthy entry on the Front Page Showcase for the week of July 11. Look for it on the FaithWriters home page--and congratulations!