Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Win A Publishing Package HERE            

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Discern (08/12/10)

TITLE: Adventures In Personification Society
By Sara Harricharan
08/18/10


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

The nurse standing to the left offered a smile in the child’s stead. “Master Donovan, please take good care of her.”

“Don’t I always, Shimei?” He sighed, extending a hand to the little girl. “Will you accompany me?” He asked the required polite phrase.

The curly head bobbed once. “As you wish.”

“I mean it!” Shimei scowled. “You sent Truth back as a hyperactive chatterbox and Justice as a bundle of nerves! Do you have any idea how much therapy it’s going to take—you can’t just use them for interrogations whenever you—”

“I’m sorry, Discern.” He directed his smile downward. “I should have requested you first. Do you mind?” The curly head tossed, pert nose stuck in the air. “Ah. You do. But, it cannot be helped. I didn’t think that they would hold out this long. Shall we?”

They headed for the investigation department.

Soon, they entered an interrogation room. Seated at the table within were three identical young women in, with each face mirroring varied degrees of disdain.

Master Donovan waved towards the triplets, leading Discern forward. “I’m going to ask them again, please watch carefully.” He cleared his throat. “Which one of you released Misery?”

The first triplet flashed a playful smile. “Wasn’t me, honest! I didn’t have a thing to do with it!” Her black eyes glittered. “Ask me again!”

“Mischief!” Master Donovan scowled.
“Enough, sit down! You’re all making this more difficult than it has to be. Chaos, did you release Misery?”

An admirable glower was the answer returned, as the triplet lifted her chin. “I don’t need to answer that.”

“She didn’t do it.” Disaster piped up, leaning towards her triplet. “Really! You’ve got the wrong people for this, just let us go and-”

“This is a serious situation! I do not think you three fully realize the consequences you have brought upon yourselves. Allow me to list the grievances! You released a personification that does not pertain to our realm. You did so without permission from Eyleon Academy and from The Society itself! You smuggled the personification through the city’s protective dome and then you released it in the town square! Not only did your actions contribute to mass panic, physical injury, mental distress and troublesome situations for nearly every local personification—but also a mountain of paperwork for Human Resources!” He paused for a breath. “In addition to these crimes, you summoned it with illegal energy!”

“It’s not an it.” Mischief drawled. “It’s just like us. We’re personifications too and so are you! He was tired and lonely, I only invited him out to play, how could you-”

“You just confessed, idiot!” Chaos smacked her triplet upside the head. “Now you’re on your own! I had nothing to-”

“No, Chaos! You can’t leave her-” Disaster shot to her feet. “Mischief-!”

Master Donovan grabbed Discern by the shoulders. “Which one of them did it? If I don’t get an answer for Wisdom-”

Discern wrinkled her nose, brow furrowed. “You’re Judgment, right?”

“Yes.”

“You haven’t guessed?”

“I would not have requested your assistance if I did not-”

“Why do you use big words?” She yawned, leaning against him. “Can’t you tell the difference? Can’t you see?”

“Er-Mischief?”

“No. She’d love to be it, because it fits her perfectly.”

“Then Chaos?”

“Because she won’t say anything? No.”

“But it couldn’t be-” His gaze settled on the fidgeting Disaster. “You!” The horror registered on his face. “But why?”

“It was an accident.” Discern shrugged. “It turned into a disaster and she couldn’t help it. Then her sisters discovered-”

“They thought it was marvelous.” Disaster sniffled. “I didn’t mean to!”

He stared at them. “But-!”

“You spend too much time judging.” Discern rolled her eyes. “Try being Daddy more than Judge-y! They were trying to get your attention. With something this big, you’d be the one to oversee their charges.”

He blushed. “Girls?”

The triplets stood, heads bowed. “We’re sorry, Father!”

Discern pushed him forward.

“Then Truth and Justice were-?”

“I just wanted a hug!” Disaster burst into tears, flinging her arms around him. Her sisters joined her almost at once and a flustered Judgment attempted to calm them.

“I-it’s okay.” He managed. “I’ll-”

“I’ll talk to Wisdom.” Discern headed for the door. “Don’t worry, Mama always listens to me.”


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 585 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/19/10
This is a great story. It reminds me of something I'd read in Aesop's Fables. I was confused a bit,there were a lot of names and I was having trouble figuring it all out. Then I read it again and it became clearer. There were times when an added word was there or a word was missing. I figured from my own experience that happened when you were cutting words to keep it under 750. It's a creative and fun idea. I'd love to read more stories with these characters.
Ruth Brown 08/19/10
I love it all; from the title to the characters. It was totally out of the box. Very well done. Blessings, Ruth
Amanda Brogan08/21/10
Very interesting. I was surprised to discover that the triplets were actually his daughters in the end. Discern was very wise. Wait, Wisdom is her mother. Okay, she was very discerning. ;)
AnneRene' Capp 08/23/10
You definitely captured my full attention with this cleverly written entry. Reminded me of Pilgrims Progress...unique! However, I too, did have a little trouble keeping up with who was who.
Chely Roach08/23/10
An extremely clever, whirlwind of a story! Lots of fun!
Rachel Phelps08/25/10
Awesome! I'd read more about this little society - a book of vignettes would be nice. :) Loved it!
Mona Purvis08/25/10
A Pandora's Box of a kind, clever.
It was a bit confusing, but mostly due to the fast-pace of it.
You made some very clear points within the content. Creative, for sure.

Mona
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/30/10
Congratulations for placing in the top 15 of your level and in the top 30 overall.