The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/01/08
This was very original. Very good job.
03/25/11
I like this a lot!

I think the beginning of your 4th paragraph could have been stronger by using active voice. So I'd do something like "Peerky Pickle's farm and Dutch barn had disappeared."

I loved the paragraph about the out door bathroom! Made me laugh. :) Nice job on this one. Very creative!