The Official Writing Challenge
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Mystical and fast paced.
Granny's dialog is wonderful.
I enjoyed reading this rustic piece.
Great job of mystery and suspense in this interesting story.
05/27/08
The suspense you created with Granny's monosyllabic dialogue kept me reading to find out what happened. Love the touch of "magic" in the horse's ability to communicate with the MC, and I love the voice of the MC, too. Very creative writing!
This intriguing story, easily part of a larger work, was quite suspenseful.

Having such tension from the beginning, I suppose it was difficult to determine a conclusion, but I'm afraid I found it somewhat abrupt and anti-climactic, though I have good reason to believe that help would arrive in time, and Jack would be fine in Granny's capable hands.
I might suggest combining these two sentences, as the second is actually a fragment. "Fiery red gems glowed in the flickering lamplight. Granny’s spider rubies, beautiful gems with a black spider embedded in each center."

Your vivid descriptions drew me right in.
05/28/08
Your descriptions are incredibly vivid, and your dialogue is VERY strong. I enjoyed this very much.
05/28/08
Yes, this makes sense! Wowzer!!!! This captured my imagination and held the reins in tight.
05/28/08
Love the title! Granny's remark about the horse talking was lost on me, until... =) Nice job! Blessings, Cheri
You're a master of description and suspense! This is a great story, I kid you not! Wonderful job! Kudos!!!
You captured my heart with this mystical story. I adore horses and your Sundancer is a fine portrayal of the equine species. Well done my FaithWriter friend.
I enjoyed this. It was a refreshing change from a lot of the other entries this week. My only complaint is that the ending had me begging for more. I could definitely see this being a series of stories or one big novel. I appreciate you sharing this.
Ooooh wonderful! I absolutely loved this. You have done a great job with the dialogue and the atmosphere. Super job Ms Harricharan :-)
05/29/08
You are an amazing writer. This to me was a winner this week. Original, creative, mystical, and refreshing... BRAVO... your ideas are inspirational.. loved Granny!
02/28/09
I had to come read the ruby earrings inspiration, and I'm so glad I did. But of course, I want this story to go on and on...