The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/09/08
This story of Miriam isn't nearly as widely known as the earlier story of her with baby Moses--thanks for reminding us.

You might want to work just a bit on more showing and less telling, and it's best to avoid exclamation points except in dialogue.

Good job with the setting--very realistic and visual.
05/10/08
It would be helpful if Scriptural References were footnoted for those Readers who are not familiar with the Bible Story.
05/10/08
PS: By the way, nicely retold Bible story, which makes me want to revisit and re-read the original version of this "Lonely Lady" - thus the suggestion for a Scripture Reference. Well done.
05/11/08
Definitely a less-known OT story, but nicely done. A bit more description would bring this more to life. Enjoyed this.