The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/02/08
This piece is not good enough to be entered in the advance section.
02/02/08
A very good example of the topic, and a great title. A little polish (some of your phrasing was a touch awkward) and this would really shine!
02/02/08
Oh my, how scary! I love that the mother listened to that little voice of warning in her head, and that she caught the bad baby-sitter before damage was done!

This is all too frequent today, isn't it? My heart went out to the little screamer, and I was so glad that the less "glittery" babysitter turned out to be the real gem.
02/02/08
Speaking as a former childcare worker and nanny, I have to agree whole-heartedly - experience over youth and "education" is a much better guide.

A little more show and less tell and this would have been a stronger entry.

I liked the mom's thoughts as she left about the makeup and nails :)
02/02/08
I love your title! Very appropriate with your story. You certainly kept to the topic! Great job on that! Keep on writing. You show much talent!
Laury
02/02/08
A very good example of how appearances can be so deceiving ... and you carried this theme very well throughout your story.

How scary ... and a good lesson you've written.
02/02/08
I LOVE your message, and this should resonate with many a mom. As for commenter #1, I totally disagree, but I suppose he's allowed to have an opinion ;)
02/03/08
When I entered this piece, I regretted it almost straight away as I genuinely didn't think it was good enough for the advanced section. Hence my original comment.
I'm very sorry if anyone has been misled, and ask your forgiveness.
On a lighter note: you are all a kind bunch! On an even lighter note: I think it is the most times that one of my pieces has been read.
Oh my! When I read the first comment I thought "What mean person wrote that?" Writer, I think you underestimate yourself!! I thought it was well written and illustrated the point well.