The Official Writing Challenge
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Good advice!
07/12/07
Glad you didn't go the predictable "he hit it out of the park" route. This was refreshingly honest.

I think you meant "pitcher" toward the beginning, and there were a few comma faults, but those are minor.

You really had me rooting for this little fella!
07/12/07
There's a good message in this story about gaining confidence with each small step we take toward our goals. Your main character had me rooting for him and the grandfather is the perfect picture of love and encouragement.
07/13/07
Good story to send in to a SS take home paper for children! :) This moved along nicely and kept me interested. Good work!
07/14/07
Go Johnny Go! You had us pulling for him all the way! Great story, good job! ("pitcher" tripped me up a bit...but it's only minor league, right?) Kudos!
Excellent message about how to build confidence in our children. And God is even more patient and loving with His!
07/17/07
A couple of glitches but a pleasant story without the predictable rhetoric.
07/17/07
Enjoyed this - loved the interaction between the grandpa and the boy.
I could just picture cute little Johnny! It was refreshing that he got tagged out. Very honest. I was glad that Grandpa was positive. This will build confidence in a child. Very nice.
07/18/07
Your great characterization really gave life to this story, and I love the message!
07/18/07
A cute story! I like Granpa's last line at the end with taking it once base at a time. Nice job!
This is a great "grandpa" story. One step at a time--just the right message for confidence.
I liked the fact that he played through his pain and doubt. Great lesson story and well-told!
This would be good for young boys to read. What a grandpa!
07/18/07
Good one! Great job capturing Johnny--I loved his muttering to himself at the beginning, that's a great line to tuck away! :D
07/18/07
This was an awesome story, I could feel every bit of it! Great writing.
07/18/07
This is a good story for young boys. I struck out fewer times after I lost my fear of striking out. Being afraid you'll look stupid or klutzy destroys many potentially good players both on the ball diamond and in all endeavors of life. Learn from your mistakes and move forward. One base at a time is excellent advice. A little more familiarity with the casual language of the game would improve your story. Now forget I said something a little bit critical and write another baseball story. You've got great potential.