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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Write in the POETRY genre (05/17/07)

TITLE: Turning White Wings Dark
By Sara Harricharan
05/21/07


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My wings are broken
I cannot fly
Iím trapped beneath
A darkened sky

Wanting to breathe
Wanting to see
Wanting to know
The feeling of free

To show I am unique
No cookie-cutting here
I glide along silvery air
What a precious treat!

Knowing my past
Seeing my future
Ditching this mask
An unpleasant task

Strong white wings
Pure as innocence
Tipped with color
Perfumed with incense

They carried me through
The endless night
Holding me tall
A shimmering knight

Battered and torn
Blistered within
Exhausted and worn
Silenced without

My beautiful wings
Are crippled and broken
The spirit you gave me
Sold as a token

I must reach inside
My innermost self
Must dig and find
A heart that shines

Lighted and polished
In His delight
I take new courage
In crooked flight

Give me new wings
Fashioned by your hands
Finish this song
I am still learning

Lift me up on clouds of music
Wrap me in your sweet melody
Write the lyrics on my heart
Do it ever so painlessly

Youíre giving me wings
Huge and new
Filled with your blessings
And sparkling virtue

I pray to you
Dear God,
Help me
Unleash true creativity

Heavenly Father
Oh no, oh dear
What have I done?
To warrant this fear

These wings are giant
And so very dark
Father, canít you see
They will destroy me!

I do not deserve
This horrible disgrace
This Ďgiftí youíve give me
Brings shame to my face

I am light
They are dark
My wings of white
Were my trademark


I do not deserve
This horrible disgrace
This Ďgiftí youíve give me
Brings shame to my face

Shh! You say
Shushing my protest
You donít understand
Itís not a test

Your darkness will help
More than you know
The rich, the poor
Forgotten ones below

Your wings of white
Buckled under pressure
The power of night
Stained your treasure

These darkened wings
Will take you far
Soothing and healing
Even the smallest scar

The color may be dark
And the wingspan broad
But it will blow your mind
As you gaze in awe

Look beyond
Your tiny eyes
See the future
As it cries

Feel this sorrow
Share my passion
Fly onward
Into the rainbow


Copyright 2007


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This article has been read 1070 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jacquelyn Horne05/24/07
I'm a little lost in this, but I sense a deep message here.
Julie Arduini05/24/07
Whether I'm right or not, I was so moved by the symbolism here and it read to me like an alternate Song of Solomon--a journey of love and faith with the Lord. This was so visual. My only wonder is the last stanza. I almost liked the second to the last better to end on, but still, it doesn't take away. What a gem!
Rhonda Clark05/25/07
This was very touching. Glad you shared.
Leigh MacKelvey05/29/07
I liked the imagery and it flowed very smoothly. I would go back over all the verses and possibly let go of the ones that don't add to the poem. It is a strong poem , but could be stronger if you tightened it up. the meaning is deep and I liked the deepness!
dub W05/30/07
The rhyme may be a little forced, often happens in short verses. An intesting statement, not sure where to take it.
Thanks for posting.
Verna Cole Mitchell 05/30/07
You have great metaphors here. The last stanza is wonderful--sums up the whole purpose of your poem, and of the difficult places of life as well.
Patty Wysong05/30/07
So many things in life we don't understand when we look with out small human eyes. I love these lines: "Lift me up on clouds of music/Wrap me in your sweet melody/Write the lyrics on my heart..."
Loren T. Lowery05/30/07
I sense a lot of out-pouring of honest emotions in this piece and although at times got lost in some of the metaphores, I was still able to "see" the meaning behind the words.
Rita Garcia05/30/07
Thought provoking and well delivered.
Joanne Sher 05/30/07
Beautiful imagery.
Bryan Coomes05/30/07
I certainly agree with comments posted here already. Loved the imagery and could feel the emotion of the piece. Flowed well...even with the duplicate verse :)