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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Write in the POETRY genre (05/17/07)

TITLE: Magdalene: Movement Two
By Terry R A Eissfeldt
05/20/07


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I rose up from the dusty ground
As innocent as Eden’s dawn;
With every breath I breathed in life
For all my tormentors had gone.

With gentle Mary’s helping hand
I finally looked into His face.
The one who freed me from all harm;
The one who saw beyond disgrace.

His eyes were like deep pools of love,
Unlike the type of love I knew.
Not demanding, taking, grabbing,
But tender as the morning dew.

His strong right hand reached for my face
And gently wiped away my tears.
“Rabbi,” I began to stutter.
“Hush, now child, and do not fear.”

“If you’re willing to follow Me
I’ll gladly teach Kingdom ways.
Nothing will be able to steal
The peace and love bestowed this day.”

“Go with Mary. She will take you
To her house. She’ll help you to see
That you are a child of Heaven;
Who you were always meant to be.”

With one last look into His eyes
I found strength to go with Mary.
She gave me water, soap and oil,
And clean white robes to cover me.

As we broke the bread that evening
She told me of the Rabbi’s birth.
How when she was but a young girl
Gabriel came to reveal her worth.

She was called by God in Heaven
As a vessel for Him to use.
Willingly she yielded to God
And bore Messiah to the world.

So this Jesus was Messiah!
He truly did the work of God.
I was captive but He freed me,
I live in light; the dark is gone.

So I became a willing heart
Yielded only to Christ my Lord.
I, Magdalene, no longer whore.
I, Magdalene, a child of God.


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This article has been read 716 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Sharlyn Guthrie05/25/07
Well-rhymed. The meter seems to skip a bit, however. The first half is very strong. Great potential here.
Jacquelyn Horne05/26/07
Nice poem of a Bible truth. Encouraging to those who need a saviour.
Julie Arduini05/26/07
This is beautiful! I stumbled a bit over the stanza that started with Go with Mary but not enough to realize there is no way I could have pulled this off. Well done!
Benjamin Graber05/27/07
I like this one - there are some really neat lines, especially "As innocent as Eden's dawn", which expresses so well the power of forgiveness.
One thought for critique: some of your rhymes sound a bit forced, you might want to be careful of your rhyme choices.
Keep up the good work!
Rhonda Clark05/27/07
Wonderful! Beautiful! Great job.
Myrna Noyes05/29/07
Lovely, touching poem about Mary Magdalene! I especially appreciated the stanzas showing how Jesus dealt with her so tenderly. My favorite one was "His eyes were like deep pools of love,
Unlike the type of love I knew.
Not demanding, taking, grabbing,
But tender as the morning dew." Nice writing! :)