The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
11/09/06
I loved this story! Delightful dialog and characterization all the way through--I could see and hear those children. I also really liked the way the story begins and ends with the funeral procession. Great job!
11/13/06
Good job with this one. A very realistic viewpoint of children on a farm (I should know, I grew up on one myself). Their pretend games are just like this (one minute a doctor, the next a preacher, the next an astronaut). You also adopted a colorful vernacular for the children. This was just a very enjoyable read. Thanks for sharing.
11/14/06
I was preparing to comment on what the funeral had to do with the latter part of the story - when it all came together at the end. So, now that "that" is settled, I can comment say it was an interesting read, supurb dialogue, creative and enjoyable. Few minor punctuation errors, otherwise well written. I liked it.