The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/03/12
Nicely done. I am glad that "Faith" warned her about the unscrupulous actions of "Mary."

I enjoyed this. God BLess~
02/04/12
I'm very pleased that everything worked out well for the MC. A lovely story that rings true for me and my hubby; he has to work every second weekend. We didn't like him having to but Australia is becoming a nation of shop-a-holics. It was recently announced in the media that the powers at be are trying to remove public holiday status on Easter Sunday - that is not acceptable at all, and my husband has said if it does go ahead, he will not work that day.

Well done on a beautiful entry..
This is an interesting story. The title is a perfect fit. I was quite intrigued by the naivety of the MC.

Make sure you start a new paragraph each time there is a new speaker, even if it is just one word. It might be a good idea to have someone proof it for you to help you catch some little punctuation errors.

You did a nice job writing on topic. It was a pleasure to take the trip down memory lane with you.
02/08/12
I enjoyed the memories your story brought back to me. I am especially pleased to see how Verna stood for her faith. A suggestion....not sure if you use a grammar/spelling checker with expanded capabilities to show structures, but it might help with the punctuation and paragraph separations.

Good job and thank you for sharing your story.