The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/18/06
I enjoyed reading the contrasts between your life and that of the celebrities; a genuine serenity comes through in your writing. Consider leaving off the "word study" in the first few sentences and just starting with your story--it's a far more compelling "hook". Loved the birds and butterflies--like I said, very peaceful.
05/18/06
Sometimes the dictionary is not on target when it comes to the meaning of certain words in one's life. You gave a totally different meaning and it was far more profound than the typical understanding of the word. A secular dictionary can not cast the true riches that surround us every day.
This was a compelling comparison between the worldly success and real success. Watch your spelling and and punctuation. When you submit your writing preview it so that you can get the layout more eye appealing and less difficult to read. Otherwise it is a good read.
05/25/06
Working through a very difficult diagnosis like "Ovarian Cancer" will likely bring out a barrage of conflicting emotions but it could possibly bring a sense of peace, perspective and a shared experience to another who is fighting a similar battle. Consider a rewrite of this piece to improve readability being careful not to purge the sincere emotion that comes through and add to it in a journal format. Not only will this give you a place to go with the feelings that you are experiencing but it could be a lifeline of hope to someone else. Thanks for sharing this.