The Official Writing Challenge
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03/13/06
Very clever, and a delightful way to convey your message-lesson to a child, or any reader. Good job.
03/13/06
I like this very much but - my opinion only - I think it is more telling and witty without the grandfather-grandson interaction at the end. It turns the story into a moral tale, and I think it works better as a humorous take on the Biblical story - which brings to life the original very capably. Great stuff, either way.
Hehehe, cute story! Great job!
03/14/06
I liked your ending. It made sense to me because I had been wondering if it was meant to be a children's story. As you probably realized, you missed a couple of commas and 'dad' used as a name should be capitalized. I enjoyed your story. Good job!
This is great. I can really appreciate this as I am a Sunday school teacher. Awesome job!
03/15/06
I liked the story very much. I didn't see it as a lesson in responsibility because the son DID lock the doors responsibly. It was more a tale of...well, a tale of life on the boat! I write childrens stories and could easily see the first part as a picture book. The interaction between the grandson/grandpa could be left in, but again, I'm not sure a lesson on responsibility really fits. Cute story, nice visuals
03/15/06
This is very cute, and I like the interaction with the grandfather at the end--a good transition from story to storyteller. This only thing I wondered about was the age of Noah's son--you wrote him like a young boy, but Noah's sons took wives on the ark. Nevertheless, a charming story.
Good story. I like the different version of ark life and the interaction between grandpa and grandson at the end.
03/17/06
WONDERFUL!!! I could see it all happening!!
03/19/06
I'd like to see this as an illustrated picture book! I can see it already. Well done.
Yeah Debbie!!!!!!

Congrats on getting in the top five!
03/20/06
I liked by the end it turns out to be a story for kids and getting them to use imagination. The title maybe could be reworded the "on on" at first look likes a typo or stutter. Since it was the Grandfather talking (which is not known until towards the end) I will not comment on the added "ed's" or wrong choice of words like "spilt" it could be the way the Grandfather spoke. A fun story.
Funny with a great message! Well done~!