“Ladies and Gentlemen, our final set of contestants: Miss DeBoat... Miss Demeanor...
Miss Trust... Miss Shapen... Miss Apprehend... and Miss Cellaneous! You’ve now met all
our lovely ladies, aren’t they beautiful? Mr. and Miss Judge will be casting their votes
tonight, who will be the winner of the Miss Nomer Pageant?”
“Lord, I ask for Your help in this exhibition. There are many temptations and prideful
enticements. I want to be a winner. I really do. But Miss Advise, the other day,
suggested I skip my Bible reading time to go shopping with her. Miss Direction tried to
get me to attend a psychic fair. Lord, I’ve tried to stay away from Miss Behave, Miss
Conduct, Miss Appropriate, and Miss Guide. They have flaunted vile things, but I
choose to walk uprightly before You. Thank You for being my strength.”
“Ladies and Gentlemen, you have viewed the exquisite evening gown parade, now it’s
time for the swim suit competition.”
“O, Lord, help me to remain poised, with head held high, though my suit is much more
modest than most. Lord, teach Miss Becoming, Miss Creant, and Miss Tress how to
dress appropriately, that our brethren won’t stumble. You have asked us to dress
modestly, help each of us to be pleasing to You.”
“How about that, Ladies and Gentlemen? Wasn’t that exciting? Stay tuned for the
“Lord, thank You for helping me with my solo. I hope everyone sensed Your Presence
as I praised Your name. I felt so sorry for Miss Aligned, Miss Count, Miss Cast, and
Miss Step during their performances. Father, show them they should lean on You to
help them in the future.”
“Wasn’t that magnificent? We’re going to finish this contest with a question for our
finalists. Let’s start with Miss Anthropy. All other contestants are back stage in a sound
proof booth. Now, Miss Anthropy, is it true that you have a hatred for mankind?”
“Yes, Mr. Anchor, I do. I believe that mankind is worthless and deserving of death,” she
sneered as she exited the stage.
“Next, Miss Apply, is it true that you take God’s Word and make it say what you want?”
“Why, yes, sir! Uh... I don’t want to obey all those old laws. This is modern times, the
twenty-first century!” she left, nose in the air.
“Next we have Miss Belief. Miss Belief, it say’s here that you suspect the validity of
Jesus being the Son of God. Can you expound on that?”
“Well, you know... there have been so many knowledgeable men, and many have
taught good things. How can anyone say who is God’s son and who isn’t?” she tittered
as she left the stage.
“Come on out, Miss Quote. Now I’ve been told that you can quote the whole Bible.
Can you give us a demonstration of your ability?”
“Okay, Mr. Anchor. For God so loved some people that He gave one of His sons, that a
few that believe in Him might live a longer life.”
“Uh, Miss Quote, I’m not sure that is accurate.”
“Oh, well, it’s good enough for me,” she giggled as she left the stage.
“Lord, it’s my turn. Please help me to say the right words that will bring glory to You.”
“Our last contestant, Miss Sionary... My question for you tonight is... Do you believe
that Jesus is the Christ, the son of the Living God?”
“Oh yes, sir, I do. I believe He died for me and His blood washed my sins away. I want
to tell the world of His great love and how He can deliver everyone from sin and death.
My heart cries for those that are lost. My prayer is that they open their heart’s door to
“That concludes our question portion of the pageant. Stay tuned as the judges tally the
“Mr. and Miss Judge have made their final decision. May I have the envelope, please...
The 2006 winner of the Miss Nomer Pageant is... drum roll, please... Miss Sionary!
Come on down! You have carried yourself throughout this pageant with grace, humility,
and love. You have stayed the race, remained on course. Here’s your crown... Do you
have any words to say?”
“Yes, I want to thank my Lord. He has helped me every step of the way. He has given
me strength, love, ...and He put a song in my heart. He is the one that deserves this
crown. Thank You, my Helper, my King.”
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