The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 619 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
This is a fun poem. I can appreciate all the hazards one faces when going out into the world.

I think some of the rhythm and rhymes felt a tad forced but I struggle with that myself so I know how hard it is to perfect a piece in such a short time.

The ending surprised me. i didn't see that coming at all. I thought it would be like my house after I've spent hours and tons of money shopping someone always complains that there's nothing to eat. I like that you took me in a different direction then what I was expecting. Nice job.
10/11/12
That last line made me "grimace" been there, done that! LOL. Nicely done, cute poem...and an interesting way of presenting the topic.

Thanks. God bless~
10/15/12
Very cute poem. I can identify because I hate going to the mall now, and know what it is like to spend too much. Good job!

God Bless!
10/16/12
Shopping is not my favorite chore. Many of the situations you mentioned are part of the reason why.

Thanks for sharing.