The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
03/17/11
First of all, I identified with the mom, here. The rolling of eyes from my own children, because of my not "getting it." Also, I was again in your tale when you mention people thinking eternity was about "an end." Nice twist. The math, the Indian tale, and the turtle soup, flowed naturally so I could swallow the whole thing.
03/17/11
I never knew what the turtle stood on. You have be at the get-go and kept me to the end. Nice take on the topic and so nicely written. Expect you to do well with this.
03/19/11
Cute stuff!I found myself reading a little faster to see how the story ended. Good job!

On Tiara - she seemed a little old in her thoughts and vocabulary for one just starting school.

Overall, nice writing!
03/19/11

Amusing!

Liked the ending- it rounded off the story so well. And a good twist on the theme of Eternity.

I'm not sure what grade the girl was supposed to be in but she did sound a bit very aware and older. My daughter is in 3rd grade and she does sound a lot like Tiara so that kind of put me in that perspective when I read the story.

I liked how the girls bounced off each other in dialogue within their sisterly relationship.
03/19/11
Your characters are lovely and engaging. What a great story for this topic! Very original and well done.
Great job on the topic. I loved the family interaction and enjoyed the story all the way through.
I enjoyed your characters and dialogue. The story flowed very smoothly and definitely held my interest throughout. Tiara could have easily been my youngest, who would sometimes blurt out the strangest questions, fully expecting answers from her hapless parents. Well done!
03/21/11
Very nice! This has a good flow, a definite beginning, middle and end, engaging characters and help my interest. Good job.
03/23/11
This is an excellent story that makes one ROFL! An interesting way of explaining what it means before the beginning and after the ending—something we can only understand if we have a brain like God's.
03/23/11
From the very beginning, you allowed me to "see" the scene and I was instantly engaged in the story. I paused a bit at what might be seen as an overuse of "ing" verb endings. Still, nice, homey approach to the topic.
Creative and cute story and well-written.
03/23/11
Cute story-I loved it. Well written. God bless!
03/27/11
Awwww, so cute! I loved it and I'm proud to be in the story! I giggled at the "It's turtles all the way down, Sonny!" part.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, in fact, because I've been studying a lot of doctrine as I grow in my relationship with Christ. But I need to keep reminding myself when it doesn't make sense that I don't have a God brain -- I'm just a kid, after all!