The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
01/20/14
I'm not sure if this is a poem or not....so I'm not sure to address the lines as paragraphs or stanzas, but the 1st group of words were my favourite.

There are little rhymes here and there but not consistent. for this line: "To death do us part" I think you meant "Till."

However, I do love the argument that you presented and your take on the topic. Keep writing.
01/20/14
Very excellent thoughts on how: Many times we don't even know what we want and expect more than we are willing to give, etc.

I think this is written more like prose than poetry, though I'm no expert.

Keep on writing and letting it flow. Catch ya next time—I gotta go. :)

01/21/14
You've got some great thoughts going on here. I would simmer it on a low burner and cook it down - the savory ingredients will be enhanced in their flavors, and leave your readers with a meal they will remember.
01/22/14
Great job at conveying the "endless" things we all face in life.

This type of writing is not my forte, therefore, I don't feel I can offer any kind of constructive criticism.

Godd luck and God bless!