The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/22/10
I'd have liked to see "oops" inserted in the story, although it was certainly implied. Not sure what to suggest, but it seemed to end rather abruptly.
Pretty good, but I would have liked to see a little more. The girls and their grandparents seemed to have a nice relationship and I wanted to know more about them. Thanks for sharing though. I love s'mores. ^_^
01/23/10
The dialogue was great and the story flowed easily. Good job!
01/25/10
A fun, light children's story.

My only suggestion would be a different title--yours is very clever, but it spoils the kicker of your story.

Keep up the good work!