Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Lifeguard (11/09/06)
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TITLE: Murky Waters | Previous Challenge Entry
By Pamela Kliewer
11/15/06 -
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Soon, she gave up the fight, lulled into a stupor by the strength of the current. She floated along, not knowing where she was going. Her senses all fled as she sank into near oblivion, no longer caring what was happening to her.
She let the current carry her along, tossing her here and there, now and then pulling her into its dark, icy depths. Battered against rocks and snagged by tree limbs, her body and face bore scratches and bruises. Her hair was a tangled mess. Debris from the water clung to her face and hands. She noticed none of it.
For weeks, she floated along, senseless. Heedless to all going on around her, she continued to drift. One day, as she neared the shore she saw something on the land. She wasn’t sure what it was, but it seemed to have the shape of a man. For the first time in a long time, she was somewhat alert. She squinted, trying to see what was standing there. It was a man! He was dressed in white and he was the most beautiful being she had ever seen, so pure and clean. His face radiated joy and peace.
Something stirred in the depths of her being. Longing for what this man radiated, filled her. She hadn’t felt this much stirring in her soul for ever so long. Her heart gradually awakened. As she continued to look at him, she saw his hand stretched toward her, a hand scarred. She vaguely wondered what had happened to him. Then he spoke. She knew that voice. Somewhere she had heard it before, gentle and soothing, loving and kind. “Child, let me help you. Give me your hand.” Those words awakened her completely. Her eyes fixed on his, she placed her hand in his, letting him pull her from the murky, icy waters that had enslaved her for so long. Never had she trusted anyone as wholly as she trusted him now. Without a doubt in her mind, she knew that he had come to save her.
Wanting to know him, she asked who he was. His answer shook her to the core of her being. “I am your lifeguard. I have been watching over you for quite sometime now, guarding your life, when you couldn't see what was going on around you. I am here to save your life. You have opened your eyes a little bit to see, open them wider still and look at me. Fix your eyes completely on me, and really see. What do you see, Child?”
As her vision cleared even more, and she pushed her hair out of her eyes, she saw with increasing clarity who he was. She noticed his eyes, so tender, beckoning her from their very depths to lose herself in him. Her eyes fell on his hands, noticing that not just one, but both, held scars. Suddenly, her gaze drawn to his bare feet, she saw scars there as well. Shocked, she realized the shapes of the scars were from nails. Her mind began to wake up even more, her heart breaking, knowing that she had put them there. One word erupted from her mouth, knowing as she said it that he indeed, was her lifeguard, here to rescue her. “Jesus!”
Arms open wide, Jesus took her into his embrace, holding her as she sobbed against His chest. “My child, you are forgiven, washed clean. No longer do you have to float along endlessly in the murky waters. I am here. I have rescued you from yourself and from sin. I have clean robes for you. Here, put them on.” He handed her pure white garments, sparkling with jewels. She put them on and immediately knew a transformation had taken place. She would never be the same again. Her Lifeguard had watched over her, loved her when she was unlovable, sought her out and rescued her. She would be eternally grateful for His gift of love.
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Favorite lines were, "I have rescued you from yourself and from sin," "Longing for what this man radiated filled her," and "You have opened your eyes a little bit to see, open them wider still and look at Me." I also appreciated the description of the stirring of her senses and the awakening of her heart.
Excellent writing! :)