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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Control (01/30/06)

TITLE: Right-of-Way
By Cheryl Harrison
02/01/06


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Waiting… waiting… the change of the traffic light seemed to be taking forever.

“It's about time!” she muttered when the long awaited green arrow finally flashed, allowing her right-of-way to pull onto the highway. Unfortunately, an oncoming Jeep didn't agree with her next move.

The description of the accident differed between witnesses and victims. Witnesses said, “It all happened so fast.” Victims said, “Time slipped into slow motion.” From her vantage point, the whole thing lasted an eternity.

Over and over, she replayed it in her mind...

The distant honk of a horn warned of impending danger. The squeal of rubber tires against wet pavement sent shivers down her spine. The dreamlike vision of a silver Jeep crashing into her car, along with horrible sounds of metal grinding against metal, seemed unending.

The impact resembled a slow motion nightmare. Her car spun out-of-control, stopping with a jerk and then coming to rest on the highway. She faced the opposite direction from which she originally intended to go and the other car continued moving. Stunned, she watched the Jeep veer into the gas station parking lot. Her eyes widened with fear as it crashed into a pump, knocking it off its base. She held her breath, expecting an explosion. But, thankfully nothing happened. Witnesses fled the scene knowing one small spark could devastate the area. Honestly, who could blame them?

A few seconds later, her mind cleared. She realized the threat of an explosion had passed and permitted her car to roll into the parking lot. A deep sigh of relief settled her shaken nerves. Knowing God had protected her from harm, she offered a prayer of thanksgiving.

For her, the collision produced a deep sensation of being out-of-control. However, in retrospect, God proved to be in complete control. If she had pulled onto the highway one second earlier, the Jeep might have sailed through her car door, resulting in serious injury or even death. But by the grace of God, nobody was injured.

Later, once the dust and his insurance had settled, God’s ability to protect her came to mind. She knew God's promises were safely tucked inside his perfect plan for her life. Resting in the assurance of God being in control, she carefully pulled onto the highway, in her brand new car.
_________________

“The LORD will keep you from all harm-- he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.”(Psalm 121:7-8 NIV)


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This article has been read 845 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Georgiana Daniels02/06/06
Good reminder that He is in control, even when things get scary. Our own car was "out-of-control" last week, with the accelerator sticking, and me unable to slow down the vehicle for what seemed like an eternity. But it's true that He's already on the scene before we are. Good job!
Nina Phillips02/07/06
Whew--I think about angels watching over us. Nice work on your story. Very vivid descriptions. God bless ya, littlelight
Phyllis Inniss 02/08/06
Thank God for that assurance that He is indeed in control. Your article was very interesting and very readable.
Jan Ackerson 02/08/06
Very good lesson! Would you consider approaching this another way? (the accident-in-slow-motion idea has been done quite a bit). You're a good writer--look for unique approaches to familiar situations to make your work stand out.
Val Clark02/11/06
Well written story. Very visual, you give a great sense of place. I would like to have known more about the character's feelings and physical reation. A timely reminder that God is in control even when we aren't or we don't think he is.
Debbie Sickler02/11/06
This was pretty good. I liked how she got a new car out of the deal. Shows it worked for good and reminded me of the out come of my only accident. :)

I'd like to make one suggestion though. How about if you started it with the line about a distant horn warning of danger instead of telling it as a flashback? I think that is a much more attention grabbing opener than waiting for a light to change.
dub W02/11/06
Other than some dialogue issues in the third paragaraph this is a very well done narrative. Thanks for posting.
Linda Watson Owen02/11/06
Well done! You had me all the way through. One suggestion: "Later, once the dust and his insurance had settled, God’s ability to protect her came to mind." Clarify whose insurance it is--possibly use 'the other driver's'. I like your use of 'once the dust and the insurance had settled'. Great phrase!
Anita Neuman02/11/06
Great story! All those helpful comments show that everyone here thinks you're on the right track and they're pulling for you to keep going. You've got a great "voice", you've sucked the reader into the story, and you've presented a very important message. So keep at it!
Sandra Petersen 02/11/06
I have to ask, Cheryl, did this actually happen? When you described the silver Jeep continuing to move and pulling into the gas station, I thought 'hit-and-run driver'. Good lessons here about the protection offered by the Lord over situations out of our own control! Thanks for sharing!
Debbie OConnor02/11/06
Great writing! You don't belong in beginners. I've been in an accident like this and the reason the slow motion wreck has been done is that it really happens that way. Solid lesson, right on topic. Well done!