The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 191 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
04/26/13
Overall I like the idea of this piece, but I found it hard to read because of the formatting. Putting a little space between the paragraphs can help the eye move through it better. Keep up the good work!
04/29/13
Good Story. Got lost in the second paragraph, but found myself again. One of the sentences didn't sound right.
Get a good proofer and keep writing!
Tell me more . . .

Throw a Brick for CLICK

http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=36947
I really enjoyed this intimate peek into Jimmy's relationship with God. It is one we all dream of having, but like Jimmy at times can be a tad stubborn!

I wasn't sure what the clicks were. I thought maybe he was unlocking doors as he made his rounds. Make sure you start a new paragraph each time someone different speaks and if you double space them it makes it easier on the reader to have that white space.

All in all I think you did a nice job of showing what a personal relationship with Jesus can be like. I really thought the prayers were powerful and enjoy it when a writer includes the prayer to show a reader who may not know how to pray, that it is much like talking to your best friend. Good job!