The Official Writing Challenge
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Wow this is an awesome story line. I was intrigued from the very beginning. The suspense continued to build until the last word.

It does need a bit of polishing since it's almost impossible to polish a story in only one week. A challenge buddy might help you with things like smoothing out awkward sentences and catching typos.

I think this is a great story with a wonderful message. You nailed the topic in a creative way. I really enjoyed the characters and liked the ending. I knew something bad would happen but not sure what. You didn't disappoint me.
01/21/13
You muct have a working knowledge of what goes on in financial world or you done your research for this piece.
Thanks for sharing!

If you want further feedback go the forum's 'Chuck a Brick' for this topic,
01/22/13
Great way to approach the topic...nicely done and well written. God bless~
Thoroughly enjoyed this piece. Great word pictures and references to war and battles throughout wove together a tight story that wouldn't let go.
Well done.
01/24/13
WOW!! This is GREAT!! What a a well-written, suspenseful, clever story with a powerful ending!! No wonder it garnered a first place level win and an E.C.!! WAY TO WRITE!! :)
Congratulations on receiving an EC on your first challenge entry. That is impressive. I knew this was a great story!
01/24/13
This story was full of twists and turns. Your tale was creative and thought provoking. Congratulations on 1st place in category.
01/24/13
This piece was well written -- and even us "non financial people" could get the gist of the trading situation. Good ending.
01/24/13
Congratulations on your first place win! Great story, you have a definite flair for story telling. Keep writing!
01/25/13
Nice story. Congratulations on winning first place
01/25/13
Congratulations on your 1st place win! Double congrats for your Editor's Choice placement!
01/25/13
Congrats. God bless~
02/06/13
Great story, Vince!
Congrats on the win; much deserved. :)