Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Download/Upload (11/17/11)
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TITLE: Info Highway | Previous Challenge Entry
By Wesley Hesketh
11/21/11 -
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ADD TO MY FAVORITES
most of the time I can get mine to crash.
When I’m told I must download some information, I can set aside an hour or two for a 20-minute program. You see my computer was made during WWII, and takes eight days to do one thing. If you want to know what I want for Christmas….
Yesterday I tried to retrieve some data from my bank. After the fifth try I just called them. I found I could download things much quicker into my head.
I didn’t know how bad I was until I was asked to upload something. I patiently filled out the forms, and typed in the information, but when I tried to send it, it disappeared.
Have you every seen a grown man cry?
I’m glad that uploading to that big computer in the sky is way easier.
Now it’s God that has to have that everlasting patience. But you know He is good at that. Plus he already knows what you need.
When He gives me the answers to my cries. He makes them plain and simple. I’m so glad. But wouldn’t you know, after He sends it, true to my hopeless form, I hit the wrong key and erase it.
Do you know how hard it is to ask God to repeat Himself??
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I smiled at this: "You see my computer was made during WWII..." We all can relate to that sometime or another.
Good job- God Bless~
There were a few punctuation errors, particularly with commas. Your first sentence, as written, should be two separate sentences, while the first two sentences in the last paragraph should be one (When He gives me the answers ...).
Over all, this was nicely written, a clever concept and an ending that made me grin. :)
I noticed there were a few places where the spacing was off. To avoid this, make sure you hit preview before you submit. This will allow you to see how the article will look. A good hint so you don't hit submit accidentally is to leave the level and title part blank until you have proofed your piece and are ready to submit.
I think you did a lovely job covering this difficult topic. You pulled me into your story right away. The ending put a smile on my face. This is a well-written,enjoyable read.
I'm not sure if the parting
line was a good fit to tie your main points together, but I could be wrong.:-)
Your spiritual comparison has the potential for a great devotional
Nice writing!