The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
12/02/10
Great ending. Enjoyed the read.
12/05/10
You've given a great description of how doubt and fear can grip the homeless and the down and out. It's true, the Church needs to be more proactive. Not sure if this was meant to be a poem in free verse. You've included enough detail to develop the material into an actual story.

What a touching story. Very few people would have that courage. It's sad that many church members would laugh at her or give her a look. You gave a good message.
12/07/10
An interesting piece. Lots of good description - just a couple of typos but nothing much. Check out some of the masters' pieces for presentation. Thanks for sharing a very interesting article. Colin
The very heart of this piece is excellent. It's a little wordy in places, but there is much passion in your voice, and I could actually hear your heatbeat with compassion for your MC. You have the talent and anointing, the small things will come. Great job. I look forward to reading more from you. This piece is especially good when read out loud.
12/07/10
I agree with Henry...the word "passion" came to mind while I was reading this story. This was raw with strong emotion. It's a message the church (that includes me) truly does need to hear.
12/08/10
What a wonderful topic for this prompt. Excellent work, though I agree with Henry that it was a bit wordy at moments. Keep writing.
12/08/10
Thanks for sharing this interesting approach to this week's topic. I have a heart for the homeless and your piece touched me.