The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
08/02/05
That was a great entry all the way through. Loved it. God bless ya, littlelight
08/04/05
Good message and fast paced reading. We are not promised tomorrow. I think you have a few paragraphs squeezed into one at the end. I'd like to see those separated.
08/04/05
Good intrigue. Ditto on the paragraphs.
08/04/05
A well told -and timely -story.
08/06/05
Good writing. I liked the natural style of sharing but don't think that someone would say 'in Corinthians 2' to a non-Christian.
08/06/05
Nice twist on the theme and unfortunately something that everybody can relate to these days. I like the direction of the dialogue but maybe needed a little less dialogue and more about what made this person captivating. Great way to present eternal life.
Darlene
08/08/05
I really enjoyed reading this, Karen. Your characters are believable and you gave me a real sense of being there for most of the story. The 750 limit trapped you into finishing with 'tell' instead of 'show'. Think about how you could change that if you expanded this. Next time you have a lot to say at the end of a challenge, pick the most important part and 'show' what happens. Very promising. Well done.
Yeggy