As of today, I am 35 years old and somewhere between being a worthless chunk of coal and something beautiful. I have been a lot of different people over those years and I am not proud of most of them. But when I gave my life to Christ, I gave up all those people and became something new. These days, I strive to be a gracious person; one of warmth, compassion, and kindness. But I still struggle with that wounded animal inner soul of myself that isnít all that happy about life in this new skin. When you grow up the way I did, you learn how to fight and defend and protect yourself, inside and out. Living graciously takes courage and requires vulnerability. And I donít come by either trait naturally.
But when God spoke to me and asked me to share my story, He asked for transparency. He doesn't allow me to tell pretty fluffy stories I would like to believe for myself, but the dirty, grimy truth of my journey. And really, it is the least I can do.
Blessed beyond all measure and daily healed and ministered to by Him, how could I possibly say no? My fears and anxieties in showing the real me and allowing myself to be vulnerable are simply nothing compared to His sacrifice. So for His glory and of my weakness, I write.
I try to tell the story of who I really was and who I really am now - a chubby Realtor from Austin with a messed up childhood and long road to redemption. I gave my life to Christ only about a decade ago and I still have a lot to learn. I live in the beautiful Hill Country of Central Texas with my handsome hubby, our dogs, cats, and a little family of deer. I get up every day and try to live this life the very best way I know how, by following Him. Sometimes I get it just a little bit right. Often, I get it a little bit wrong. When it comes down to it, I am human and I am a mess. But I am His.
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