TITLE: The Decision (revised) By Sanna Scales 02/03/16 |
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I remember the day I was enjoying my bouncy little boy. He was so adorable. With his reddish brown hair, big brown eyes, chubby cheeks and a smile that would light up the room. We were home alone together that day. I was 24 years old and my little son was only 8 months old. I realized my life was no longer just about me. The path I would take, and the decisions I made affected him too. Even though I had my son out of wedlock, I always felt God gave him to me for a reason. I loved him with all my heart and he loved me too. It was that day I made a decision.
For 3 years, I was in a common law relationship with my son’s father. Not a day went by where he didn’t treat me badly. I felt broken and beaten down by words of condemnation. I cried quietly to myself whenever I was alone. I didn’t understand how someone could be so hurtful to someone else. I was stuck in the cycle of violence. He wounded my soul bit by bit each day. He tried to destroy my spirit and my life.
I knew God wanted more for me, not this kind of life. I got on my knees and cried out to the Lord. He heard my cry and led me to Psalms 27. It spoke about how God will fight for you, that he will protect you from your enemies, to have courage, He will strengthen you and wait upon Him. I told myself “You can do this! God will help you”.
I knew it was only a matter of time something would happen. Something so terrible he would have to go. So I waited… and he did. During the weekend, he went on binges and didn’t come home until the wee hours of the morning. During those times he was unfaithful. This was enough to make him leave.
My son and I had a new start. I sought counselling right away, to make sure I didn’t fall back. I needed to be strong for me and my little boy. There isn’t a day that goes by that I am not thankful for what God has done in my life.
This is a just a small glimpse into my story. It was a really tough time in my life. God redeemed me. He set me high upon a rock and restored my soul. He kept me safe from my enemy. I am thankful I made that decision. About a year later God brought a wonderful man into my life. We were married and he became a father to my son.
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