Kids & Parenting
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Teaching Decision Making Skills To Children
© 2015
by
Stephen A. Peterson
In order for individuals to make appropriate decisions, he/she must learn how to do so. Behaviorists for more than 80 years, have learned making appropriate choices is taught, learned through informal observation, and how the individual processes or perceives what he/she has been taught and observed. With or without guidance, learned behaviors become habit that is often difficult to reverse once learned. Parents/caregivers have, as a result of study after study, been to be most important towards helping youth learn to make appropriate decisions. Institutions and social activities also play key roles in reinforcing parent/caregiver training and guidance.
Parents/caregivers, institutions, and social activities may provide opportunities for young people to make appropriate decisions. Opportunities for facing and dealing with alternatives, learning about possible results of choice or choices, choosing then facing the consequences of a young person’s choices, is an experience all young people need.
It has been found that children whose lives have been completely planned by her/his parents/caregivers and those denied the experience of making situational choices, cannot be expected suddenly to accept responsibility and make wise, informed choices. The temptation is for parents/caregivers, teachers, counselors to allow children/young people opportunities to make choices due to fears they may make poor/wrong choices. Poor choices often result in negative/adverse consequences. In parents’/caregivers’ desire to protect young people from harmful consequences, there is a real danger that they are denied the experience necessary to the intelligent cultivation of socially mature decision making.
If young people are to become mature decision makers, there are risks. A child cannot learn to swim without going into the water. He/she runs some risk of drowning. Children cannot learn to choose wisely without entering the arena of choice. They must run some risks from mistaken choices. Intelligent guidance has been found to reduce the risks, just as a lifeguard can minimize the danger of drowning. Let those who influence and work with young people, allow them to grow, even at some risk to them and to ourselves. It is the only way young people become men and women who will generally make appropriate decisions in the majority of situations.
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