Humor
Christmas To Be Canceled
Dateline The North Pole (AP)
From David Ian Associated Press Correspondant
Due to the intensive elf strike in which neither labor nor management seem to be budging, it is probable that Christmas is in danger of being canceled. The elves cite poor working conditions, overworking and mandatory overtime during "Crunch Time" and an "unreasonable" Health Plan which does not include covering frostbite, hypothermia, or many other cold related conditions.
"We're ELVES for cryin' out loud," says labor union leader elf Tingleberry, "we're made for dwelling and frolicking in FORESTS! Have you ever tried to "frolick" out in that cold wasteland out there? Well???"
"They bring it on themselves if they go outside without proper thermal protection," says management leader Fritz Frolo. "We won't subsidize this kind of irresponsibility through the Health Plan which is already skyrocketed in premiums."
North Pole management was already planning on bringing in brownies and gnomes to replace the elven workforce, but this move was countered by the sympathy strike by the Brotherhood of Flying Reindeer which put the final blow for the future of this year's Christmas.
"Let's see him scab-out replacements for US," said Blitzen in very recent press release commentary. "What could he use to pull his sled and make his world-wide one night schedule? Owls? Flying squirrels? I don't think so!"
Santa could not be reached for comment, though it is understood that alternate methods of present delivery are being sought, and high level talks at press time are being conducted between the major parcel service carriers and North Pole representatives.
PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
Reader Count & Comments
Date
Te, He, He. :)
Oh, by the way, I think it's HYPOthermia. Hyperthermia would mean the elves are too hot. Enless that's what you meant. ;) Just thought I'd mention it.
Ah. You're quite right, thanks for the correction. Unless, of course, the elves were speading their summer break in the Sahara or something...
The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com. This is especially true with articles that
deal with personal healthcare and prophecy. We encourage the reader to make their own decision in consultation with God, His Word, and others as needed.
This article has been read 1051 times < Previous | Next >
Read more articles by David Ian or search for other articles by topic below.
This article has been read 1051 times < Previous | Next >
Search for articles on: (e.g. creation; holiness etc.)
Read more by clicking on a link:Free Reprints
Main Site Articles
Most Read Articles
Highly Acclaimed Challenge Articles.
New Release Christian Books for Free for a Simple Review.
NEW - Surprise Me With an Article - Click here for a random URL
God is Not Against You - He Came on an All Out Rescue Mission to Save You
...in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them... 2 Cor 5:19
Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you. Acts 13:38
LEARN & TRUST JESUS HERE
FaithWriters offers Christian reading material for Christian readers. We offer Christian articles, Christian fiction, Christian non-fiction, Christian Bible studies, Christian poems, Christian articles for sale, free use Christian articles, Christian living articles, New Covenant Christian Bible Studies, Christian magazine articles and new Christian articles. We write for Jesus about God, the Bible, salvation, prayer and the word of God.