Search found 21 matches

by flyingcross
Fri Jun 18, 2010 8:28 am
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #15--WELL-CONSTRUCTED NON-FICTION
Replies: 46
Views: 36943

Love to

Hi Jan, Asking a writer to write more: "Be werey, werey careful." (Elmer Fudd). I do see your point...and I take that as quite a compliment. See if this helps. Thank you, Cindy It was the grand of all grands. It outshined them all. Those that tickled its ivories felt like they had seen inside their ...
by flyingcross
Thu Jun 17, 2010 3:16 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #15--WELL-CONSTRUCTED NON-FICTION
Replies: 46
Views: 36943

Muscial Instrument

It was the grand of all grands. It outshined them all. Those that tickled its ivories felt like they had seen inside their own souls. Though the four legs could never run a race, the sounds that emanated from wires and pedals would make any heart race from the stories the masters told. The Steinway ...
by flyingcross
Tue Jun 01, 2010 7:33 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #11--Creative, Unique, Fresh
Replies: 74
Views: 60374

#1

In my dreams I live every day like my last. That’s why everyday things are only outside my dreams.

Thanks,
Cindy
by flyingcross
Tue Jun 01, 2010 9:48 am
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #11--Creative, Unique, Fresh
Replies: 74
Views: 60374

#3 topic

“Only one person, that’s all I need--one person to care.” The fallen angel’s light glowed softly, beckoning someone, anyone to help her. She was cast out, but had fallen hard, and without that one person she would die. She cried out, and her beacon glowed, but was slowly fading. She felt them lookin...
by flyingcross
Fri Apr 30, 2010 9:58 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Jan's Writing Basics #9--Writing on Topic
Replies: 65
Views: 81373

Thank You

Hi Jan, I want to s:ay thank you. Ecclesiastes 1:13 "I devoted myself to study and to explore by wisdom all that is done under heaven. What a heavey burden God has laid on men." I appreciate you sharing what you know. I had no outlet, and no real way to find how to refine what I have to share. Your ...
by flyingcross
Wed Apr 14, 2010 10:28 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Jan's Writing Basics #8--Developing Interesting Characters
Replies: 69
Views: 71766

New Character

Hi Jan, My sister loves Jan Karon, and I'll have to say, there are some wonderful characters in them. My new character. Her glassy eyes took in nothing of the television that blared in front of her. This was her life, her choice, to drink to survive the onslaught of anxiety. It had brought her to th...
by flyingcross
Thu Mar 18, 2010 10:37 am
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #8--Writing Out of the Box
Replies: 94
Views: 60744

Thanks

Hi Jan, Thank you, and to Catlin's comment as well. Living inside the box can get kind of stuffy, while outside there's lots of fresh air. Appologize, my story had a mouse, but there were no people, but candy characters. I wonder about making the mouse a chubby red cheeked sticky fingered little boy...
by flyingcross
Wed Mar 17, 2010 6:36 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: #8--Writing Out of the Box
Replies: 94
Views: 60744

Fire

1. house fire
2. got fired
3. fire-man, truck, house
4. firefly
5. fireplace


The horses energy was like a wild fire as her hooves flew across the yellowing grass of fall; the sparks could be seen as she outraced the wind. Nothing could catch her. No man would bridle her. She was free.
by flyingcross
Wed Mar 03, 2010 8:57 am
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Dialog #3
Replies: 54
Views: 41108

Thanks for help

Corrections. Thanks Jan, I need to change comma to period, and last need clarification. It's hamburger. New ending: Tofu fainted, landing squarely on the bed of lettuce. “Hey, that looks pretty good!” Hamburger covered Tofu with a tomato blanket and gave her a pickle pillow. “Kinda pale though. Coul...
by flyingcross
Tue Mar 02, 2010 7:26 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Dialog #3
Replies: 54
Views: 41108

Out of Town

Hamburger said, “Please pass the lettuce and onions. I’m a vegetarian.” Tofu quivered as she handed the condiments to Hamburger,” No problem. Here you go.” Hamburger peeked out from under his bun. “What’s wrong with you? Never met a vegetarian before?” “No, not personally,” said Tofu. “Wow, not arou...
by flyingcross
Mon Feb 22, 2010 8:51 pm
Forum: Ann's Grammar Basics
Topic: Commas (Part Four)
Replies: 20
Views: 17920

Infectious

I, oh my, where, oh where, what, how could she, no, left us, oh my, oh my, could it be, yes, I think, they’ve run away on their own. I’ve seen it before, like, well, ummm, not sure, think the word is commatosis, a virulent infectious spreading of commas. The only cure is known by Ann. Hope you had f...
by flyingcross
Mon Feb 22, 2010 3:25 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Dialog #2
Replies: 52
Views: 54901

Dialog Trouble

“Help! I’m soooo lost, and I can’t find ‘said’ anywhere. Please help me.” “Oh my, you are a sad case for lost and found. I did say to try to move the ‘good stuff’ into the dialog. Maybe I should clarify, ‘said’ is rather bland, not really good stuff, so put it back,” said Jan. “No, no, I can’t. I ca...
by flyingcross
Mon Feb 22, 2010 9:42 am
Forum: Ann's Grammar Basics
Topic: A break from commas
Replies: 21
Views: 12631

Probably Missed This one, sorry.

Hi, I missed all of these. If too late, I enjoyed this lesson just the same. It was very helpful. Thank you, Cindy One of my favorite things is doing the laundry. It’s relaxing to me, and nothing makes me happier than my hanging clothes in the sunshine. My neighbor, whose husband is a truck driver, ...
by flyingcross
Mon Feb 22, 2010 9:15 am
Forum: Ann's Grammar Basics
Topic: Commas (Part Four)
Replies: 20
Views: 17920

Need Help

Hi Ann, I'm hoping the muddled up slowly unjumbles as I continue to plod away. If God knows my heart, why don’t I listen? He’s been whispering, like a child playing with two cans on a string, I just can’t understand. Please speak up, forgive me, it’s just too hard to hear you. If my sins were washed...
by flyingcross
Sun Feb 21, 2010 6:17 pm
Forum: Jan's Writing Basics
Topic: Dialog #1
Replies: 103
Views: 88376

Thanks Jan

I love the input, thank you.

A single tear slides slowly down Tina’s face, her lip quivering--
Joc’s all grown up, she won’t need me much longer. Mom was right, I was way too young.


Changed the ending somewhat as well.
I am trying.
Thanks,
C

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